The Dan Slott Interview

The Amazing Dan Slott

Dan Slott, one of the main writers of Amazing Spider-Man, let me interview him at the New York Comic Con.

The Kid: Why did you want to write Spider-Man?

Dan Slott: Well they asked me and I said ‘yes’. You can never say no to something like that. You don’t say ‘oh let me think about it’ or ‘no give it to someone else I don’t think I want to do this’. You beg them and say ‘yes, please let me work on Spider-Man!’

Kid: What super powers would you want to have?

Dan: You know what? I’ve dedicated many years thinking about this very question. When I was younger it had to be flying. I always thought it would be so cool to be able to fly anywhere. Now that I’m older there is no question that I would want the ability to read and control people’s minds. If my boss told me my script is due at the end of the week I would use my mind to tell him ‘I need more time. I need two weeks’. If I want to go see Slumdog Millionare and my friends are saying they have to do laundry or something I’ll will them to put the laundry away and see the movie with me.

Kid: What super hero would you want to be?

Dan: I think Captain Marvel is really cool. He has all these great powers and at the same time he turns into a different person. No one would know who he was. I wouldn’t have people bothering me asking me to start their car in the morning or to get their cat out of the tree. After I was done my super hero stuff during the day I’d switch into Billy Batson and go about my day. Martian Manhunter is very cool, too. I mean, he has all the powers. He has super strength. He can fly, shape shift. He even has Martian vision. You know what that is?

Kid: No

Dan: Neither do I, but it sounds like it has to be really cool.

Kid: Who is your favorite super hero?

Dan: When I was younger it was Spider-Man. When I was a teenager I really liked Moon Knight. Moon Knight is the Marvel Universe version of Batman if Batman goofed up all the time. I thought it was so cool to have this really tough guy who was trying to fight crime and beat up the bad guys and he was always kind of screwing up. And who wears white when they’re going to fight crime at night anyway? And now it’s back to being Spider-Man as my favorite. I loves me some Spider-Man.

Kid: What sidekick would you want to have?

Dan: A superhero sidekick or any person?

Kid: Superhero first

Dan: She-Hulk.

Kid: Really?

Dan: Yeah. She Hulk is awesome. She’s tough and she’s cool. And she’s not all crazy like her cousin. She’s not going to get mad and start punching me for no reason.

Kid: What about real person?

Dan: Um, probably Michael Phelps.

Kid: Who?

Dan: Michael Phelps, the Olympic swimmer. He seems cool enough and like he’d know how to handle himself.

Kid: Who’s your favorite villain?

Dan: Mr Mxyzptlk. Ha, try and spell that one! You might need to Google it or something. I just think he’s a great character. He can do all these crazy things and it’s always funny how Superman tries new ways to get him to say his name backwards. I always thought there was such an easy way for Superman to get him to say his name backwards. Wanna know how?

Kid: How?

Dan: Knock Knock

Kid: Who’s there?

Dan: Mister Kltpzyxm

Kid: Mister Kltpzyxm who?

Dan: Ha. Gota ya. See how easy that is! I think it’s fun to try and get different ways for Superman to trick him into saying his name backwards. Maybe he could sing about it. You know, I once wrote a Superman musical.

Kid: What?

Dan: Yeah. The DC people were very happy with it. It looked like we were going to be able to do it. I had everything written, including the songs and when it came time to animate it the guys who were going to be doing it all said, ‘nah, we’re not doing this. It’s stupid.’

Kid: What weapons would you use?

Dan: I’m a cheap guy so I’d probably pick a boomerang. That way it always comes back to me when I use it. Guns are okay but then you always have to buy more bullets. Throwing stars are cool but then they get stuck in the bad guys and you lose them. With a boomerang you only have to pay for it once.

Kid: What kind of costume would you wear?

Dan: I’m in the Marvel Universe so I’d probably have to go with the traditional red or blue. Maybe black. It can’t be green and purple. Those are bad guy colors at Marvel.

Kid: Seriously?

Dan: Yeah. Think about all the bad guys who wear purple and green. You have Green Goblin, Mysterio, Swordsman. That’s probably why everyone gives the Hulk such a hard time.

Kid: What kind of mask would you wear?

Dan: I think Iron Fist has the coolest mask. He’s got half of his face showing and the Spider-Man kind of eyes. It’s very cool.

Kid: He was walking around here earlier.

Dan: That’s cool.

Kid: What villain would you fight?

Dan: You know what, I’ll put it all on the table. I’d fight Galactus. Yes I would. And when I was through with him he’d never bother the Earth again.

Kid: Who would you rather fight: my dad or that guy over there (points to a con goer in a yellow and green 28 jersey?

Dan: Hmmm. I’m going to have to say your dad.

Liam laughs

Dan: Yeah, but you know what? Me and your dad would be fighting a long time and in typical superhero fashion we’d make up and then we’d team up to go after that guy (points to now perplexed man in green and yellow 28 jersey)

Kid: If you were a bad guy, who would you rather fight: Captain America or Deadpool?

Dan: Deadpool. I couldn’t fight Cap. He’s such a good guy. Even bad guys probably feel so bad when they have to fight Cap because he’s so nice. Everyone loves him. No one likes Deadpool.

Kid: I like Deadpool.

Dan: Sorry

Kid: Would you rather be 20,000 years old or 30,000?

Dan: Definitely 30,000. If I’m going to grow old I might as well go all the way, you know? But I’m definitely going to have to floss a lot if I’m that old.

Kid: What kind of store would you rob as a villain?

Dan: I once had a character I created called La Pinata who only robbed candy stores. He would cosume all the candy and then after one punch he blows up and candy explodes all over the place. One thing I would never do is rob a camera store. No way. Everyone would know what you look like! But you know what? I would rob from a crook store. That way everything I take is something that was already taken by crooks. How’s that.

Kid: How would you like to die?

Dan: I want to drown in a giant vat of chocolate. Mmmmm chocolate. Then you’re dead. It would almost be okay.

Kid: Would you rather be toilet paper or a toilet plunger?

Dan: Toilet plunger. The paper could be used.

Kid: Yeah but I didn’t say if the toilet plunger was used, either.

Dan: That’s a trick!

Kid: Which super hero would you rather marry: She Hulk or Ms Marvel?

Dan: She Hulk. She Hulk is smart and strong and funny. She Hulk would be great. But if I really had to make a choice I’d marry a Skrull. Honey, today can you make yourself look like Angelina? It’d be great.

Kid: But then you’d be marrying a boy?

Dan: What? No.

Kid: Yeah. Skrulls are boys.

Dan: Trick question. You never said the Skrull was going to be a boy. I’d pick a girl Skrull. Not a boy. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Kid: What if you were a girl?

Dan: That’s another good question that I never thought about. If I was a girl I would marry Dan Slott. Because he’s handsome and dreamy. I’d also think about Starhawk. Cause half the time he’d be a girl.

Kid: If you could turn into any animal what would it be?

Dan: That is an excellent question. I’m going to say a goldfish.

Kid: A goldfish!!! (laughing)

Dan: Yeah. Of course. What’s wrong with that. Being a goldfish would be awesome.

Kid: No it wouldn’t.

Dan: Look, if you’re someone’s pet it’s not like you’re going to be going out for Italian food every night. At best you might get table scraps once in awhile. Usually you’re going to get that gross canned or dry food. That’s disgusting. And sometimes you’re going to have to eat garbage or something gross like that. But goldfish are really, really stupid. Yeah. A goldfish forgets things like 15 minutes after it happens. So sure I’m going to be swimming around in my own poop a lot of the time but 15 minutes later I forget all about it and life is great again.

Kid: What kind of pet would you have if you could have any?

Dan: I’d go with a monkey. It’d be a helped monkey, though. He would be able to do things for me kind of like a monkey butler or something…even if it’s just turning on the TV. I have cats now but they don’t do anything for me. I feed them. They don’t like me. At least the helper monkey could help out with dinner, even just taking something out of the microwave.

Kid: What if the monkey turned evil?

Dan: If my monkey turned out to be a villain!?

Kid: Yeah

Dan: Then I’d have to do the right thing and turn him in. I’d make sure that he went to monkey jail.

Kid: Thanks for doing the interview.

Everyone should go read Amazing Spider-Man and Mighty Avengers because they’re awesome.